Winking at Wrong
“People who wink at wrong cause trouble, but a bold reproof promotes peace.” (Proverbs 10:10)
Can you identify any trouble that has come into your life at any point because you winked at wrong? Surely we all can, for all have sinned. There must have been some point in our lives, probably several, wherein we knew something was wrong and we did it anyway. Perhaps you knew the content of the movie or show is condemned in the Scriptures but you watched it anyway. Or maybe you saw someone doing something they shouldn’t but you chose not to speak up. When we wink at wrong, we cause trouble, whether it is immediate or delayed and whether we recognize that trouble or not.
“Remember, it is sin to know what you ought to do and then not do it.” (James 4:17)
The modern western Christian might be doing a lot of winking. After all, the most successful shows on Netflix, HBO, Showtime, and cable television, wouldn’t be so if Christians were staying away from them. Trouble is a natural and logical consequence of winking at wrong, but the second part of Proverbs 10:10 doesn’t sound so logical: peace coming from a bold reproof—how does that work? A reproof is “an expression of blame or disapproval.” How many times has expressing blame or disapproval brought peace in your life? This seems contradictory; usually, if you blame someone or express that you disapprove of something they are doing, you’re met with hurt feelings, arguments, lashing out, perhaps they fire a blame or disapproval right back, but not peace.
“A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare.” (Proverbs 15:1)
“Dear brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by some sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation yourself.” (Galatians 6:1)
“All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right.” (2 Timothy 3:16)
Some of this comes in how the bold reproof is delivered. As Christians, we should represent Christ in everything we do, and this includes how we speak to others. We might be 100% correct in our reproof but if we deliver it in a harsh way, we risk tempers flaring and peace coming much later than it should. If we let fear stop our bold reproof and instead we remain silent while the wrong continues, then trouble will follow. We shouldn’t be afraid to speak up, we just need to do it lovingly and gently and try, as Paul wrote in Romans 12:18, to live in peace with everyone. Now, the other side of this is how the other person listens and responds to the reproof.
“Hear instruction and be wise, and do not neglect it.” (Proverbs 8:33)
“So don’t bother correcting mockers; they will only hate you. But correct the wise, and they will love you.” (Proverbs 9:8)
“Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates reproof is stupid.” (Proverbs 12:1)
“If you reject discipline, you only harm yourself; but if you listen to correction, you grow in understanding.” (Proverbs 15:32)
“Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires.” (James 1:19-20)
While we should deliver our reproof in a gentle, loving, considerate manner, it takes two to argue and fight. There are those who will fall in the foolish category, those who hate a reproof no matter how gently or lovingly it is delivered. It is a difficult thing to hear someone disapprove of something you said or are doing but Scripture tells us how to accept instruction and discipline. Just as there are right and wrong ways to deliver a reproof, there are right and wrong ways to hear one. So how can a bold reproof promote peace? Hebrews 12 has the answer.
“No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening—it’s painful! But afterward there will be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way.” (Hebrews 12:11)
When we point out the wrongdoing instead of winking at it, we are trying to help the other person get onto the path of right living. After the correction is expressed, after the Scriptures have revealed what is wrong, after the discipline is over, the logical outcome of right living is peace. Peace comes when we are walking with our Lord and living the way He tells us to.
We must also be sure not to wink at any wrong in our own lives—this isn’t just about others. Too often we can see the wrongdoing in others‘ lives but not recognize it in our own. Ask the Lord to reveal anything in your life that you need to get rid of and pray Psalm 139:24: “Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.” Don’t wink at any wrong in your own life so that you may avoid trouble and instead live in peace.
Remember those who love discipline love knowledge; don’t reject the discipline you receive. Be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry, and keep your mind focused on the peace that will follow. If you have to deliver the reproof, do so gently and be sure it is guided by Scripture, not only your personal opinion or preference.
May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all.
—Redeemed
